there is a God!

As I wrestled with the hair dryer and straightener’s this morning I could hear the sound of huffing and puffing in the background. As I turned so see what all the fuss was about I saw my husband grappling with his newly bought trousers with the 32” waist and before you ask yes, there is a running theme in our house at the moment - WEIGHT GAIN!

I won’t make you blush with the expletives that were coming from his mouth (thankfully not in ear-shot of our daughter) but I couldn’t help but have a little smile to myself.  For too long now I have witnessed him shovelling pastries, pizzas and copious amounts of Merlot down his throat without so much as gaining a pound or two…(I won’t make you blush with MY expletives!) but looking at his Christmas pudding shaped belly it would appear that it’s caught up with him.   He was no different this morning from myself yesterday, the usual ‘Right that’s it – no more pastries, only one bottle of red a week and running and least 3 times a week’ were shouted at the top of his voice followed by ‘There is NO WAY I’m buying a 34” pair of pants’.  I dared not comment through fear of him remarking on my own weight gain so continued to style my hair with a very cheeky grin on my face.

Working in the same building as your husband does have its benefits; a sneaky cuddle when you’re feeling down, funds for lattes on ‘fudge cake Friday’ and days like today when he calls to say he’s popping to the local supermarket to buy something healthy for lunch.  Naturally when he returned and pulled out two, yes TWO pots of chocolate mousses followed by the excuse of ‘skipping breakfast’ I was not impressed and sat beside him salivating like a dog with a bone while he devoured them, clearly an amnesiac after this mornings drama queen performance.

I can’t say that I went out of my way today to avoid all things sweet ‘n’ sugary as I swilled down a Mocha with my morning toast but at the same time I haven’t been stood by the vending machine inserting my life savings so I’m calling that progress. 

I do have to confess that today has been a better day but I think this is due to the epiphany I had before dropping off.  As you know I was struggling to find the ‘perfect’ dress, the occasion – my husband’s sporting presentation evening this coming weekend and unsurprisingly I want to look best (or as good as I can given my size).  So as I lay there residing to the fact that time (and money) was running out I was going to have to settle for something from my wardrobe which for me is an absolute No-No!  I could never live with someone saying ‘Oh isn’t that the dress you wore for…’ and so one of my rules in life is ‘A new occasion ALWAYS needs a new outfit’ and why not as I work just as hard as the next women!  I digress… So as I was mentally flicking through my pre-worn items I suddenly pictured a dress; old, new, borrowed and blue just thrown over a hanger and classified in the ‘I’ll probably NEVER wear it but it’s just too nice to throw out’ category; old being that I have had it in my wardrobe for two years (at least), new as I acquired it BNWT’s and it was borrowed from a friend of a friend to which I never I returned… (Oh dear what was I saying about friends yesterday…) I presume I don’t need to explain the blue!  You wouldn’t believe the number of times I had tried that dress on and always settled for something else, it must in double figures now, and who do you contact with this fantastic news at some ungodly hour – your mother of course!  (Sorry mum).  After a couple of bleary eyed texts I slipped into a happy slumber and the world once again has been put to rights.

And so it seems my friends, with my husband’s deservedly weight gain and the dress quest complete…THERE IS A GOD!

Hugs and kisses

Miss Piggy x